Thursday, December 30, 2010



respect others if u want them to respect you~

peace and out ^_^

i think i'm evil~


am i? because sometimes i think i am too quick to judge..and when i'm usually inaccurate. this is the part where i really want to improve so badly! i love to make friend..but friends i made this few years time..usually turned out to be someone that i learn to dislike when i get to know them. running away from them hurt me as much i hurt them. i am sorry if i did that to you. i am still getting to know myself. i know this somehow will effect my own life. i am regretting this. i will learn to accept you as u are. i me..i will~

right now..head is stressing out! FYP! gosh! everytime the word cable come..i feel much stressed! gosh! should i rethink about this part-time job? but i do love this. it is like having another world. another life. a student..night as a totally free-person without any burden. thanks to make me smile. having you in my life now does mean so much to me..i hope what you say about time will come true. i don't know why i believe in you. but i do.

lies? why do people tell lies? and they say i am weird for believing too easily? what's wrong with telling the truth? gosh..i may not be kind at heart all the time..but the only thing i never telling lies. that's why i hate liar..excuses on the other hand different ;p

ok..enough said~

peace n out ^_^

Friday, December 24, 2010

senyum is the greatest gift of all~


today's topic say i smile a lot..i like it when they noticed..i know i am no pretty or beauty so i need my smile to make my appearance better..agree?

when i work i need my smile because it involves other people..but when they repeatedly come to see my smile..the smile will that day..a man came..he was teasing me..saying that he love to come because he love to look at this tembam girl..then he came to me and said ala..senyum la sket.. automatically i kembongkan pipi...OMG! i remembered a quote saying..a good girl is one who don't look and not looked i guess i shouldn't be too friendly to people like that..bknnye dtg tuk beli barang..huhu..the bad thing about working there is i am exposing myself to people..but looking at the bright side..this is good for my observations and changing my perspective towards life..that's the reality that everyone is facing..whether it is good or bad..that's what we call life~

i am still trying to understand myself and people around me..and what i found out about myself that need attention is..i need not to fall for someone too easily..heart! please..behave2...there are too many people who are not trustworthy out there..just be aware..and lookout! don't trust people blindly~

one more thing..i don't understand why married people still want to flirt around..gosh! be loyal to ur spouse please!

ok..enough said~


You Are Creative

You are open minded, flexible, and adventurous. You never quite know where you're going, and you like it that way.*true...just go with the flow~

You take a lot of time to enjoy yourself and live life to the fullest. You don't mind being in the slow lane.*yea! 

You find that most tasks are easier than you anticipated. Things are never as bad as they seem.*betol3! positive2!!

You work hard for the material rewards you get in the end. You wouldn't have your job if it didn't pay you.

You Are Fun Loving

The holidays are a nonstop good time for you, and you don't have the patience for any stress or drama.
You're hoping that you can make everyone laugh during this stressful time of year... or at the very least smile.

You are confident and secure in who you are. You like to be the life of the party.
You stay away from the sappier sides of the holidays. You prefer to keep it uplifting.

Your Attachment Style is Preoccupied

You expect others to love and respect you, but you're still working on loving and respecting yourself.
You crave intimacy, and sometimes you try to get too close to people too quickly.*sigh~

You are afraid of being rejected, and you feel ashamed if someone else doesn't share your feelings.
You tend to alternately push people away and overwhelm them. It's hard for you to find a happy medium.*still looking~

peace n out ^_^

Tuesday, December 21, 2010

heart and soul


i hate it when this things happened to me..again and again..repeatedly. But when i discuss the matter with a friend, the conclusion is..what if this is Karma? well..not saying i believe in karma..but even in Islam..things like cash pay-back do exist..huhu..i know i am being a bad girl a bad friend sometimes. i slowly ran away from might say i am being selfish. yes maybe i so..but i do this for your own benefits said i hurt maybe it is better if we dont hang around much..and it is proven..we are better like this. i love being friended to everyone. but sometimes when i get along with one person a little too close..i tend to run away..don't ask me why..maybe i am scared that we would be too close and i can't be apart from no..i am not a lesbo..i am still straight! still in love with boys..haha~

maybe this is a lesson for me..lesson for me to be good to everyone..without wanting anything back..i am mean to my girlfriends..that's why He haven't let any man come into my's OK..i am fine for now..but please Allah..let mama know about your plan~

haha..emo emo sorry..i am trying to avoid emotional-entries..but guess i am not trying hard enough..i am upset with myself because i am being stupid when it comes to this..again!! and i hate it so much! lucky tonight i am being strong must go! yosh schuzyy!! you got tonnes of things to do rather than spending time thinking about those hopeless things..go schuzyy!! you are better than this and you know it!!

peace n out ^_^

Monday, December 20, 2010

true love~

Kali ni aku nak kongsikan tentang KEKASIH aku? (aku taip huruf besar tu sebab aku terlampau sangat sayang kat DIA!) Penyayang sifatnya. Betul ni.. tak tipu punya! Pure cintalah nak dikategorikan tu. Apa taknya, masa aku susah, minta tolong sajalah pada DIA. Pasti akan datang bantuan. Bila aku susah hati, boleh terus ngadu kat DIA -> direct! Pergghh !!
Yang bestnya tu, bila aku dah ngadu kat DIA, terasa peace aje. For surelah...KEKASIH, kan?! Ish! Beruntung betul dapat KEKASIH cam ni... tak pernah nak sakitkan hati aku. Bila-bila masa aje aku boleh contact DIA. Yang seronok tu, sebab memang betul-betul rasa DIA tu dekat kat hati ni! Ye la, cinta punya pasal, kan?
DIA tak kisah pun kalau aku tak ingat kat DIA. Tapi rugilah aku. Sebab, kalau aku ingat &contact je DIA, sure macam-macam la yang aku dapat. Tak kiralah, material ke... spiritual ke... emm memang kekasih sejatilah tu! Bila aku rindu kat DIA, baca je surat-surat yang DIA bagi tu. Macam-macam nasihat ada dalam tu. Siap bagi contoh lagi nak suruh aku faham.
Sebelum ni, aku pernah gak frust. Memang sedih giler la masa tu. Ye la, cinta bagai nak rak, tiba-tiba clash gitu aje.  Tapi KEKASIH aku yg ni lain, DIA tak kisah pun dengan cerita aku frust tu. Siap bagi semangat lagi. DIA takde jeles pun.
Cuma aku je yang jeles dengan DIA. Memang ramai yang jatuh cinta dekat DIA. So, aku pun kenalah usaha betul-betul. Kata orang putih ~what you give, you get back~
So, kalau aku usaha lebih sikit, aku dapat lebih la, kan? KEKASIH aku ni baik sangat-sangat.
Perfect! Tu yang kadang-kadang aku tengah-tengah malam...  pukul 3-4 pagi tu pun, kalau aku terjaga, aku sure akan contact DIA. Rindu aaaa! Sebenarnya, KEKASIH aku ni kaya... millionaire... billionaire...dan entah apa-apa naire lagi... tu yang pemurah sangat tu. Semua keperluan hidup aku, DIA yang support... percaya tak?
Free of charge... tapi aku tak sedap hati la... mestilah kena hargai apa yang DIA bagi tu, kan? Mak aku kata, kalau orang dah bagi, suka ke tak suka, amik aje la.. .pastu pandai-pandailah membalas budi.. tu yang buat aku sanggup berkorban apa sahaja... cheewah!
DIA suruh aku belajar sungguh-sungguh. Kalau boleh belajar semua ilmu. Sebab, KEKASIH aku ni memang cerdik+bijak+genius dan lain-lain...DIA kata, tanpa ilmu, setiap amal yang aku buat semua sia-sia. DIA pun tambah sayang kat aku kalau aku rajin belajar.
Malu la sebenarnya nak cakap ni...
Emm... aku sebenarnya belum pernah jumpa DIA lagi pun. Belum bersedia la... tapi KEKASIH aku ni dah janji, satu hari nanti, mesti jumpa. Sekarang ni menghitung hari la aku ni. Tapi kecut perut gak! Takuut! Aku mesti prepare awal-awal.
Daripada surat-surat DIA yang ada tu, aku tahu la apa yang DIA suka, apa yang DIA tak suka. Mestilah aku nak buat apa yang DIA suka, jadi, DIA tambah-tambah sayang la kat aku, kan? Takpe la, berkorban sekarang, sebab dia dah janji, sapa-sapa yang DIA sayang, DIA bagi hadiah special yang aku tak pernah terfikir pun!
Ish! Rindu sangat dah ni!
Kekasih.. Aku berjanji, aku akan pertahankan cinta suci ini..
Walau nyawa digalang ganti, menggadaikan cinta teragung ini..
Tidak sama sekali..
Walaupun tak pernah berjumpa, aku tetap bahagia..
Itulah kekasihku.. Allah SWT.. cinta teragungku!

ps: thanks so much for the is true..HE is the only lover that can give everything that we ever wanted and never ask for anything back. 

i ask for HIS forgiveness..for one second today..i thought i could never find i realized that the ultimate LOVE is from YOU and u have given me everything. Thanks so much~

Allah akan memberi kebahagiaan kepada hambanya yang sabar~

peace n out ^_^

thanks Allah..yosh FYP!!


i did something last night..and i think i did it good.. and now i realize that i am being stupid..for believing it could happened to me..the truth is..they are still the same..can't be trusted! but i put myself to blame..they warned me..i am the one taking the risk. so take that! but i am super glad i realized this now. so that i know if any of this come later on..i am aware..and will just consider those as fling. but wouldn't it hurt me the most? hmm..i was hurt before. so what else can i expect..just live through it schuzyy.. it was nowhere to be seen. maybe u were not destine for that. for now. it is all about study..nothing more. full stop!

ok..come back to some serious matter..this 2 final semesters, i will be doing my FYP! wehoo! i don't know what to expect..i am excited, i am scared, i am curious and i am too are doubtful can i do this?

yikes! plus the job..and the classes..i must be joking! no is all about mind power!!! yosh!! project description is as below:

Project Title Details

Title:Development of CBM methodology for MV Overhead Lines
Supervisor:Ali Askar Bin Sher Mohamad, Ir.
Synopsis:Condition-Based Maintenance (CBM) is essential for a power utility to optimize its infrastructure assets. Rather than calendar-based maintenance, CBM involves regular monitoring of the asset and carrying out maintenance based on the health condition of the asset, its age and its criticality to the operations of the system. This project proposes to develop a CBM methodology specifically for medium voltage overhead lines in the utility distribution network.
Methodology:The student needs to do some literature review to understand the basic concepts of CBM as well as the MV overhead line equipment and technology. He/she will then need to determine the various Tier 1 and Tier 2 tests as well as the weightage for each one to compute the total health index of the overhead line.
Deliverables:Software-based template for CBM of MV overhead lines which will calculate the health index of the equipment and give instruction on the next steps for maintenance of the equipment.
Sponsor Info (Optional):
Project Type:Predominantly Design Based Project

my review: met ir ali askar weeks ago..asking about this. he said it will be about studying the MV overhead lines and figuring out the methods to make the maintenance condition-based. as it is for now time-based. Time based means, they will do the maintenance work once it reaches the scheduled date whether the machines are still in good condition or not. And for some equipments, it will be a waste of money and time because electricity in industrial = money. So this project will have and output of a software or simple user-friendly interface that will allow everyday men to key in the date and few other basic data that anyone understand and the date for the major maintenance can be estimated. TNBR is already working on the system for switch-gears and transformer. So, i am looking forward to working on this project as it is an extension for those. Ir Ali Askar said he have some materials that i can read on. So my research will start in short..right after i meet him today..if i can get myself ready..gagaga~

like i said, i am all excited about the same time i feel life after this will be more internet, mingling with pc, books and journals and focusing on it is all about the money~

focus schuzyy!!!! u can do this!!! for yourself and family! yosh!!

peace n out ^_^

Sunday, December 19, 2010



i was asked to think until 1st january..what should i do? my heart say go for it..why not..but friend say don't take the risk..Allah..please help me~

Sunday, December 12, 2010


salam~! because it's public holiday..they made me work all day because the pay is my greediness tricked me into taking the offer..and the decision has made my body tired till this i still need to work this evening.. what worries me now is..i havent finish my fyp proposal..gosh! this is bad! i need to work fast..because i need to submit it on tuesday..and on monday morning i have a conference to attend..cewah..just as an usher la..kikiki..doing a favor for dr yasmin..actually i am trying to get myself involve with as much activities because i think my brain is getting lazy these days..and  when it does..everything seems so slow..hate it hate it hate it!!

people tend to look as cashier and those who work in the service sectors as low that they dont need to respect as the same species as their own..and realizing this make me sick! the too are human..they too have hearts and souls and feeling like others..maybe they only have SPM or PMR or none for a education qualification..but they sometimes are better in handling life..i have seen people who have Dr title in front of the name but having a spoiled children..seen in tv and with my own wish here..please please please respect everyone around u so they will too respect u~

it's tiring..but i think i will love them~ ^_^

peace n out ^_^

Saturday, December 11, 2010

life is wonderful if u appreciate everything around u and be thankful for it~


today..what i learn from people..bad word just show that u are more or less like the person u cursed.

beauty treated with envy = silence
ugly treated with busuk hati = making fun

hmm..sorry..the equation doesnt make sense..but u'll understand if u experienced it.

a friend point out to me that i am an observer..yes i am..i love to observe people..i always wonder how they live their life. my stupid less experience is always wonderful and greener on the other side..but as i live my own life..the greenery there seems better to us..but not to them..that is why Allah always remind us to be thankful for everything we have.

i was once been down with all the misfortunes that happened in my life..but i believe that life must go on..and what will be will is all fated..our to live the life as if it will end in the next second..and remember the creator~

i'm sorry if my entries are becoming emotional and boring to some..but this is a blog dedicated to my thoughts and feelings..feel free not to read this if u think as such. my English may not be perfect..that's why i am writing make it better..there is always a room for improvement..all i want to say positive! that is the only way we can be happy and make others happy..i may not be one..yet..but i am trying to be 100% positive with reason and logic of course..

peace n out ^_^

ps: omg! i got a face in my head that i can't forget!! how la how it love? gosh! hope not..huuu~

Friday, December 10, 2010



i am currently doing some restriction on myself..just to make myself better..hope it will work..yosh!! :D

peace n out ^_^

Thursday, December 9, 2010

happy new year!!


almost 2 weeks since i last log in here..i'm trying to keep things to myself as i think privacy is no longer one if i keep on sharing it with the whole world..haha..but i can't stop being me..the reason i blog is because i want to learn to keep my mouth i will open up my mind using here it is~

class has started..not so much..monday 1 class..tuesday till thursday 3 hours..and free friday till a looot of thinking..i decided to do part time i have been searching..and i found one! yey! very near to my house..and the pay is reasonable..i guess..but little is better than nothing right? so today is my third day working! people are only as a cashier..i am satisfied! so i think my blog after this will talk mostly about this new experience..thinking of making it in the other blog..but i guess that will be only for real jobs..hehe..

life? not much improvements..only that i keep on reminding my self on my goals..lucky i calculated my cgpa for the next 2 sems..and i think that really open  up my mind..and i know i should start with believing i can do this!! yes!! believing is achieving..insyallah..other? i think i made up my mind..i have put up my priority! and i hope Allah has forgive me for being that i have clearer mind..i think i should be okey if i know what i am looking for..insyaallah!

this is my new year resolutions: heart and mind..peaceful in both~

go schuzyy go!! u can do it!!! yosh!!

peace n out ^_^